i noticed

i asked
if anyone can help me?
helped me to straighten my life
helped me rearrange my soul debris that has been destroyed
because i will not get to be dishonest
that i really need all that
once again i ask
if anyone can help me?

because the real 
i really can not stand through it
i felt chills when remembering
why is my life so bleak?
why can i assigned the worst things I've ever received?
please do not say "you should better try again"
or "this is your life, we can not do anything"
neither do i want this
indeed,
i want to be happy there ..
i do not want to, if the time comes, i can not feel it all
because i do not have much time
i want my dreams come true
and i also admit
i need a helping hand who is willing to help me
because really,
i was not able to do it alone without part of my body
once again i asked
if anyone can help me?
but why do i feel so sick?
i am disappointed 
i expect no
really i am very disappointed and hurt ...
i am hurt ...